Jesus H. Christ.
Private Pyle.
Why is your footlocker unlocked?
Sir, I don’t know, sir.
Private Pyle, if there is one thing in this world that I hate it is an unlocked footlocker.
You know that, don’t you?
Sir, yes, sir.
If it wasn’t for dickheads like you there wouldn’t be any thievery in the world, would there?
Sir, no, sir.
Get down.
Well, now, let’s just see if there’s anything missing.
Holy Jesus.
What is that?
What the fuck is that?
What is that, Private Pyle?
Sir, a jelly doughnut, sir.
A jelly doughnut?
Sir, yes, sir.
How did it get here?
Sir, I took it from the mess hall, sir.
Is chow allowed in the barracks, Private Pyle?
Sir, no, sir.
Are you allowed to eat jelly doughnuts? Private Pyle.
Sir, no, sir.
And why not, Private Pyle?
Sir, because I’m too heavy, sir.
Because you are a disgusting fat-body, Private Pyle.
Sir, yes, sir.
Then why did you hide a jelly doughnut in your footlocker, Private Pyle?
Sir, because I was hungry, sir.
Because you were hungry.
Private Pyle has dishonored himself and dishonored the platoon.
I have tried to help him, but I have failed.
I have failed because you have not helped me.
You people have not given Private Pyle the proper motivation.
So from now on, from now on whenever Private Pyle fucks up…
I will not punish him.
I will punish all of you.
And the way I see it, ladies you owe me for one jelly doughnut.
Now get on your faces.
Open your mouth.
They’re paying for it, you eat it.
Ready, exercise.
One, two, three, four
I love the Marine Corps
One, two, three, four
I love the Marine Corps
